I thought I would be over this feeling of loss and confusion by now! I have been back for 11 days now and still cannot seem to get used to my life here in the States. The feeling is almost nearing depression because I can't even get myself motivated to do what needs to be done around the house. May be it is because there is so much to do, the yard needs attention, the house and my business and the not having any body around to share these things with. I don't know, I do hope though that I won't have to endure much more of this feeling. My own medicine of daily prayer too has suffered, I just plain don't know how to deal with not being up and optomistic about every thing. Not that I have lost hope or feeling depressed, just confused as to what I am supposed to be doing next. I'd like to just drop everything and go back to Iran again where I seemed to at least have a purpose . God help me maintain and remain steadfast.
I am really trying to keep my usual positive and hopeful attitude towards our humanity and mankind in general, but recent events have brought the old anger back in me which is really frustration and anxiety about Politicians and the money mongers of the world about which I can take no real action of any significance. I see hunger and destitude in the masses of this U.S. of A, the richest country on earth, I see the very weak and the elderly, the homeless and the hard working class suffer while the political will of some nuts is runnning amock! God help me to accept what I can change and that over which I have no control, and please God give me the wisdom to know the difference. It is nothing new, just different land, different time in the history of the ignorant man and the greed of the fools!
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